Militant Self-Care Sounds So...Militant: How to Practice Militant Self-Care

It is.

Imagine if all black women said “No” to fifty percent or more of the tasks they were expected to perform daily.  Imagine black women opting out of the stressors contributing to their declining health.  Imagine black women openly stating that they are worthy of rest, while releasing guilt and embracing ease.

A black woman saying “No” is sure to start a war: starting with an internal one.

**Stares every black woman in the eyes**

It is time to start re-interpreting the “strong black woman” through militant self-care.  We are at war with ourselves while being at war with the world.  We are literally fighting for our lives.

Let’s define militant:

Militant (noun.) is defined as someone who is engaged in a war or who acts aggressively for their cause.

Militant (verb.) is believing in something very strongly and are active in trying to bring about social change, often in extreme ways that other people find unacceptable.

Militant Self-Care is not luxurious, selfish or earned.  It is not a handful of quick fixes that come with hefty price tags.  It may not even be the highlight of the day.  Militant Self-Care is your birthright and a fundamental human need. It is habitual, consistent and interwoven into daily life.  The commitment involves intentional (and sometimes, hard) work. And, it is lifesaving.

How to Practice Militant Self-Care

Here are some self-care practices that easily fit into your daily agenda:

• Stretching.  Find 10 minutes a day to stretch. Your body will thank you for it.

• Take Breaks.  Get up from your desk to step away from work. This will help with mental clarity.

• Breathwork.  Deep breathing helps to regulate emotions and reduce stress.

• Hydration.  Drink a glass of water right after waking up and carry a water bottle throughout the day because water does the body wonders.

• Reflection. Practice gratitude by writing down 2-3 things you are grateful for. Positive reframing helps with forward progress.

  
  

Militant Self-Care is firmly believing that you matter.  YOU matter; not the tasks that you perform or the roles that you fill.  Your mere existence matters so much that it is worth nurturing and protecting.  Militant Self-Care is fighting against what the world says of you and what your inner critic reiterates. 

Personally, I am no longer interested in the badge of honor associated with being over-worked and under-rested.  Please don’t call me “strong” because of what all I have had to carry, tolerate or act upon.  I am “strong” because I am finally saying ‘YES’ to preserving my own health above anyone else’s.  I am strong for acknowledging that social conditioning says I am not worthy of rest and choosing it anyway.  I am strong for understanding that we were not put here to merely survive; militant self-care lends the fulfilling life that I deserve.  I am strong for recognizing the value that others place on me and deciding to raise the currency.  

On this Love Day, I am militantly choosing me.  And, if you are in the Valentine's giving mode, I am open to gifts. I will gladly accept gifts of acceptance, support and praise for taking care of myself. I will accept permission to not have to prove myself to anyone.  I accept the silence and stillness that comes from not being on call for anyone.  I accept the applause for placing myself above all others.

Self-care, especially for black women, is viewed as resistance to systems that exploit and control us.  It is seen as challenging societal norms, resisting oppression and promoting social change.  Militant self-care speaks to the war that exists on a worldly level AND the one that exists internally.  It is about reclaiming agency over our own lives and choosing to LIVE, unapologetically. Militant self-care is constantly and consistently choosing to take care of YOU.

You are worth it. You deserve it. It is time.